The Perfect Neighbors

I was on a run with Lucca the other day (love my Bob jogging stroller!) and I began thinking about ‘the perfect neighbors’.

One of the things I like best about running outside is exploring new neighborhoods. Right now Lucca and I are living at my parents, and while I am eternally grateful to them for putting up with a living room full of toys, a garbage full of diapers, and a laundry room full of tiny mismatched socks, I do have dreams of moving out from underneath their roof–preferably sometime before Lucca packs his own bags and heads off for college.

Don’t get me wrong, free rent and free babysitters are not something to take for granted. Still, the dream of home ownership and stocking a kitchen full of my own pots and pans and silverware, is mine.

 So when I am on a run with Lucca, and exploring new neighborhoods across my town, one of my favorite games to play is the “what- if- you- lived- here” game. I imagine what our backyard might look like and if the folks on our street would invite us to their barbecues; what the commute to Lucca’s daycare would be like, and which color I would paint my mailbox.

On this particular day, running down a quiet street of unassuming houses, I saw a simple but inspiring scene:

An older women waving goodbye to her neighbor and her neighbor’s kids as they pulled out the driveway aross the street.

What was so inspiring about that? The way she waved:  She waved in big over-the-top strokes, as if she was flagging down an airplane, as if she wanted to make absolutely sure her neighbors knew how important they were and how missed they would be, even if all they were making was a quick trip to the grocery store. I love this kind of wave- the kind of wave that gets the whole body involved and requries full commitment and passion by the person doing the waving;  the kind of wave that can’t be missed a mile down the road.  They kind of wave that tells the receiver “you are seen, you are appreciated.”

Watching this I experienced a flud of warmth and love for humanity, and lucid moment of understanding that ”this is what community is all about.” As a single mom, one of my deepest desires is to surround Lucca with family, friends and community who absolutely love and acknowledge him–not to compensate for the fact that his father never did, but to teach him that despite circumstances that might tempt a person to believe otherwise, people are generally good, kind, and loving. 

I let myself imagine living on this street….I imagined a few years into the future Lucca boarding a school bus and being on the recieving end of this kind of wave. It filled me with joy….This was the kind of street I wanted to live on and I wanted Lucca to grow up on. A grandiose waver might possibly be the sign of a perfect neighbor. =)

What are some of the things you look for in a community/neighborhood where you raise your kids?

Are their quarky signs, like the big wave, that point to you the makings of a good neighbor?

Also, I would love hear what you guys think are some of the unique characteristics of a person that would  makes them especially good neighbors to single parents (like running their own day-care center from their home)?